Look in my Letterbox number 3 2017

It's time for our weekly look through the letterbox at the Monkey House. I may have got slightly carried away internet shopping lately so it's been a busy week.

Mummy's penpals
It was a quiet week for penpal letters but I did have three lovely letters from Kevin, Kerry and Elaine.

Subscriptions
It was a Toucan Box week again this week. We've not had chance to make it yet but the theme of the box was fireworks. It seems a strange theme for this time of year but I'm sure Monkey will have lots of fun with it.

We also received our quarterly Nature Detectives pack from the Woodland Trust. I love these packs as they give us lots of ideas for things to do outside. We're looking forward to going on a twig hunt sometime next week and painting with pine cones sounds like a lot of fun.

Shopping
I've done quite a lot of shopping over the last few weeks and a lot of it has arrived this week. I have a slight problem with writing paper - I'm addicted - and lots has arrived this week. Me and Monkey had a set each from Amazon.

I also bought this bumper bundle from a group on facebook. It's mainly for Monkey but I'll probably use some of it for myself.

We're a huge fan of instagram shops and one of our favourites is Yellow Bird Kids. They do gorgeous handmade skirts, dresses and bloomers. They've had a great winter sale on and we managed to get these three skirts for a fiver each.

I've also had a few books. I bought Finding Audrey by Sophie Kinsella for myself as part of my goal to read more this year. I didn't read anything about it other than who it was by so missed that it was actually classed as a YA book. It's been a very long time since I was a young anything but I decided to give it a try anyway and I've been pleasantly surprised.



I treated Monkey to North by Nick Dowson after seeing it at work. It tells the story of the winter migration but what made me want it was the illustrations. It's an absolutely beautiful book.



The third book to arrive was 101 Books to Read Before you Grow Up. The recommendations start at age 4 so a bit older than Monkey is but there are a few I think she'd enjoy and it will definitely be good for ideas as she gets older. She loves books at the moment and I want to encourage that as much as I can.



What's dropped through your letterbox this week?

Why I'm rocking motherhood

Being a mum is hard. Some days it's really hard and some days it's even harder than that. But us mums are all just doing our best and do you know what - we're rocking it!

I was tagged by Sara at Home with Mrs Harvey in the Rocking Motherhood post so now I'm going to share with you 10 reasons why I am totally rocking motherhood.

1. I'm an expert in allergies
Before Monkey was born I didn't really believe in allergies but that was mainly because I knew nothing about them and had never had to deal with them. Worringly, whilst stuck in hospital with a very poorly 3 month old I realised that many NHS staff either don't believe in or understand allergies either. We're under a great team now but we really struggled to get there and had lots of frustrating appointments. In those early days my Health Visitor was a great support but she told me that I needed to become an expert in all Monkey's allergies and associated conditions and be prepared to fight for her. And that's what I've done! Two years down the line and I've got a good understanding of her allergies - what helps, what doesn't and what to do when it all goes wrong.

2. I breast fed till she self weaned
When Monkey first became poorly lots of people said that formula would make her better. She'd keep it down easier and it would help with weight gain. I now know that it would have made her far worse as she would be having dairy direct rather than diluted through my milk. Once her allergies were discovered I was put under lots of pressure to move to formula as it would be 'easier'. Easier isn't what was best for Monkey though. I knew she was feeding well and that breast milk would help repair her damaged gut. I'm proud that despite initial challenges and a lot of pressure I continued to feed her until she decided it was time to stop.

3. Introducing a love of books
Books are important in this house. It was inportant to me that Monkey grew up loving books and so from being tiny we have always read to her. I read to her long before she understood the words I was saying but she always seemed to enjoy it. Now she has her favourite books that she demands we read over and over again. I also set up the baby book club. It was mainly because I was having a strop about her being excluded from messy play but it has helped her explore books in a fun way and lots of her favourites are ones we've done at book club.

4. Letting her grow up...
With all Monkey's health issues and the fact that she is so tiny it would be easy to wrap her up in cotton wool. She's still at an age where I can stop her doing things and keep her as my baby. But whilst that may mean I could relax more, I know it wouldn't be good for Monkey. She is fiesty, fiercely independent and all she wants out of life is to be big! I have to let her grow up, spread her wings a little and learn things for herself.

5. ...but letting her still be little
I love Monkey's independence and can do attitude and will always encourage that but at the same time I do remember that even though she's about 27 in her head she is still only two. The world can be a big and scary place. Sometimes she needs reassurance, someone to hold her hand of just a big cuddle. And that's fine. She has plenty of time to be big.

6. Monkey has great manners
Monkey's manners have been commented on by lots of people and it's something that always make me proud. She says please, thank you and excuse me. She is great at sharing and taking turns. She does have the odd diva moment but for her age she is great.

7. She sees me work
Going back to work was such a hard decision. At that point Monkey was still so tiny and poorly and I felt terrible about leaving her but it was absolutely the right decision. Monkey loves nursery and has learnt so much there but more than that I feel that I'm a good role model for her. She sees that mummy and daddy go out to work and they work hard so she can have nice things. She still has a lot to learn about the cost of things but she knows that if you want something you have to work for it.

8. But we fit loads into my days off
My worry about going back to work was that Monkey would miss out on things but that isn't the case at all. I've been lucky enough to go back part time and we fit so much into my days off. She goes to ballet, swimming and rock climbing lessons as well as baby book club and pramtime at a local church. We have lots of trips to the park and library too and love going to play with her friends.

9. I got over my own fears to get her the care she needs
I'm scared of hospitals. Not just scared, I'm terrified. Monkey has to spend a lot of time at hospitals. I will never let her know I'm scared. To her, it's all just a big adventure. She has no idea it is something to be scared of. She sometimes doesn't like the things they do to her but somehow the toys and the fact that everyone makes a big fuss of her make up for it.

10. Look how smiley she is....I have to be doing something right!

I'm tagging Kerry at Ramblings of a Biscornu Addict Raimy at Readaraptor Hatchling and Ann at Rainbows are too Beautiful to share the reasons why they are rocking motherhood.

Living Arrows 16/1/17

"You are the bows from which your children as living arrows are sent forth" Kahlil Gibran

Checking Laura's good toes

This week's picture is from the first day back at ballet after christmas. Monkey had been so excited to take her new doll Laura as they had matching tutus. Laura really joined in and became part of the class but she needed Monkey to show her what to do. Monkey took her role as teacher VERY seriously.

Look in my letterbox number 2 2017

It's been a quiet week for post here at the Monkey House but I thought I should still check in and show you what's arrived.

Mummy's Penpals
Six letters arrived this week all from penpals in the UK.

Mummy's mail pile this week

Charity Stuff
My penpal Ellen included a package of stamps with her letter to help our Allergy UK Fundraising Group. We collect used stanps from any country and it's a great way to help out for free.

Shopping
I've got quite a few bits ordered andcon their way to me but this is all that arrived this week...

... a waterproof sheet! Hardly the most exciting item but we do need it. Monkey did really well with toilet training and has been dry in the day for ages now but I've been putting off tackling nights. But even though I'm not ready, she is! She is dry most mornings and we've had nights where she has ripped her nappy off and it's all been fine. I need to just go for it. Wish me luck!

What's dropped through your postbox this week?

Living Arrows 9/1/17

I love the idea of this linky from one of my favourite blogs What the redhead said. It's all about celebrating  childhood. I'm already discovering that they grow up far too fast so it's something I'm going to make an effort to join in with each week.

The project originally took it’s name from a poem by Kahlil Gibran, “You are the bows from which your children as living arrows are sent forth” and  the idea is that every Monday we share a moment from our week.

So here goes...

My favourite picture from this week was taken at the library. We're lucky to have a wonderful library just across the road and it's one of Monkey's favourite places to visit. I love that she loves reading so much and I hope it's something that she'll continue to enjoy as she gets older.

The thing I like best you can't actually see in the picture. All Monkey wants in the world is to be big - and that includes reading. She's been nagging me to teach her to read for ages and has learnt a few sounds. She is super confident tough and believes she can read. She managed to get a gaggle of kids round her listening to her story.

Look in my Letterbox number 1 2017

I've been really looking forward to doing this post as Look in my Letterbox was always one of my favourite linkies. Sadly I don't think it exists anymore but I decided to do it anyway. Here's what has arrived at the Monkey House this week.

Mummy's Penpals
I've had four letters this week - one from the UK (Sheffield), one from Holland, one from the Czech Republic and one from Korea.

Monkey's Penpals
Monkey hasn't had any letters this week. She has this super cute bag that was a present from the Smiling Minion hung on her door ready for when she does though. She posted quite a few letters last week so hopefully she'll get something next week.

Monkey's letterbox

Charity Stuff
Two envelopes arrived from Uganda this week with a letter and christmas card from Regina, the little girl we sponsor through World Vision. The christmas card included a recipe for a traditional Ugandan dish called Rolex which looks yummy so I'm looking forward to trying that.

I also received a package of used stamps all the way from Australia. Our Allergy UK fundraising group use them to raise funds. It's a great way for people to get involved without it costing them anything and given the amount of penpals I have we manage to collect quite a few.

More details of our stamp project

Shopping
After treating ourselves to a Dolce Gusto coffee machine and hundreds of pods for christmas we needed somewhere to store them. We got this stand from Amazon and it's loads neater.

All that lovely coffee

Other stuff
Monkey receives a toucanbox craft kit through the post every fortnight. We had lots of fun making a bird feeder from lolly sticks.

Look what I made!

What's dropped through your letterbox this week?

Our goals for 2017

New year always feels like a new start to me. I don't make resolutions anymore as I seem to churn out the same tired ones every year - get fit, get organised, win the lottery, the usual stuff! I do love to think about things I'd like to achieve in the next year though so here are my hopes/goals for 2017.

Improved health for Monkey
2016 on the whole was actually pretty good in terms of Monkey's health. We had a few scary times along the way but we've ended the year in a much more positive place than we started it. At the start of 2016 I was beginning to give up hope that she would ever grow out of any of her allergies despite being told by many experts that she could. However she passed her soya and wheat challenges in hospital during the summer. She failed her egg ladder at the first step so we won't be trying that one for a while but I think 2017 may be the year she first tries milk! Her asthma and eczema don't seem as bad this winter and she's had a bit of a growth spurt. She is still tiny for her age but doesn't look poorly with it any more. I hope that she can continue to improve like this in 2017 and am feeling much more positive these days.

Complete the Great North Run
Although I'm feeling positive these days, we have had some really tough times with Monkey's allergies. Allergy UK were so helpful when Monkey was first diagnosed and continue to be a great support to us today. I was offered a charity place in the Great North Run to raise money for them. I'm hoping I can get round in one piece and meet my fundraising target. The furthest I've ever run before is 10k so it's a huge challenge but I have the best motivation. I think Monkey will be doing the mini run too. She did the Toddler Trot in the summer and loved it. You can sponsor us both here.

Ready to run for Allergy UK

Raise lots of money for Allergy UK
Linking in nicely with the Great North Run is our aim to raise as much money as we can for Allergy UK. We took part in their Free From Feast in the summer and were the top fundraisers. We really enjoyed it and spoke to the charity about how we could get more involved. That led to us setting up a fundraising group. We hoping to hold a few events this year which you can find out about on our facebook page. We are also collecting used stamps to raise funds - they have raised £34 so far without costing anyone anything. It's a great free way to help.

Read more books
A bit of a selfish one to finish with. I used to read loads and for various reasons I hardly ever seem to anymore. I got Jodi Picoult's new book Small Great Thingsfor christmas though and was hooked. I finished it in just a few days and really enjoyed taking that time for myself to relax with a book. I definitely need to keep it up.
Monkey has always loved her books. But now she is determined to read them by herself. We've done a little bit of phonics with her and she's doing really well so hopefully by this time next year she'll be able to.

A look back at our Christmas

Anyone who knows me knows how much I love Christmas. I'm that annoying person who starts getting excited in February. And I always kind of hoped that Monkey would love it just as much as me.

And now she does!

This is the first year she has really understood what is going on. She's been so excited and it's been really lovely to watch. She's been singing christmas songs, looking at all the decorations, being excited about Father Christmas and learning about the christmas story at church. Those last two have been getting a bit mixed up though leading to this very cute explaination of what christmas is all about.

"It's christmas soon. I'm very excited because it's baby Jesus' birthday. He was a very special baby. The sheep and some kings brought him presents. We get presents to 'member but the sheep don't know where all the children live so Father Christmas brings them."

It needs a bit of work but I think for two years old it's not a bad understanding of what's going on.

Monkey saw Father Christmas three times this christmas. He came to book club, popped into nursery with Marshall and we went to visit him at rock climbing. She was a little bit unsure at first but she did go and sit with him at all three which was much better than the screaming we had last year.

Father Christmas at Book Club

Three seems to be the number this year as we also had three christmas day type celebrations. We spent actual christmas day at home with Nana and Grandad, had a day with Granny and Grandad and also spent a day at Grandma's house.

Christmas Day part 1

Christmas Day part 2

Christmas Day part 3

Despite her coming home and telling me she was Mary, Monkey was still too young to take part in the nativity at nursery. She was determined to get involved and gave me a very detailed description of the costume she needed and even had a strop that she wanted to be a donkey instead but she is still two rooms away from their nativity. She did take part in a nativity at church on Christmas Eve though where she was a very beautiful angel. I was so proud of her.

My angel ready for her nativity

Monkey was very excited about Father Christmas coming this year and he didn't let her down. She was spoilt with lots and lots of lovely presents. Highlights were a Thomas scooter, doll's house and Mr Tumble's spotty bag but she loved eerything. It was lovely to see her so excited.

Father Christmas caught on camera

It's been a lovely few weeks but now it's back to reality. Back to work and nursery in the morning. Hope you've had a wonderful christmas.

Ooops I did it again

So I seem to have a habit of starting blog challenges I can't finish.

And then I start beating myself up that I'm behind and feel like I can't post anything else till I'm caught up.

So I don't post anything.

But then I realise how much I miss blogging and wonder if I can really come back.

That's me in a nutshell since April but I've decided to go for it.

So much has happened since then it would be impossible to recap but here are some of our best bits.

• Monkey PASSED her soya challenge!
• She turned 2 and celebrated with a baby ballet party.
• We raised lots of money for Allergy UK by taking part in the We Love Manchester 10k and toddler trot
• Monkey started rock climbing lessons
• We were invited down to London for Allergy UK's Hero Awards
• My baby has very definitely gone to be replaced by the most amazing little girl.
• We had lots of fun at the first christmas Monkey understood.

So it's not been a bad few months really. Can't wait to see what 2017 has to offer.

Allergy Alphabet - N is for Nursery

Well it was always going to happen, I fell behind on my A to Z challenge. I was doing so well but then Monkey failed the egg ladder at the first step (that's a whole other blog post). At that point my time needed to be spent dealing with allergies rather than writing about them. My baby was suffering and she wanted her mummy.

She's much better now though. And while I'm never going to catch up and finish on time, I AM going to finish. The allergy theme is so important to me and the last week has reminded me how serious they can be.

So, I'm up to letter N.

N is for nursery. For any parent the decision to send your baby to nursery is a tough one. I think for an allergy parent it's even tougher. While your baby is at home with you, you can keep them safe. Trusting somebody else to take the same care of them and their diet is a very big step.

We first looked round Monkey's nursery three days after her big stay in hospital. I very nearly didn't go. I'd been wobbly about it before her diagnosis, now I was convinced that nobody would be able to look after her. I even thought they might not take her - I definitely expected to have to provide her meals or maybe pay slightly more. I'd read all kinds of horror stories in allergy groups about how nobody could care for allergies properly.

I really had to build myself up for the visit but as soon as I'd been I felt so much better. They were really reassuring about her allergies and the nursery looked like a fab place. I knew Monkey would be happy there.

Monkey started nursery in April 2015 when she was 9 months old. She settled really quickly and more or less picked her own keyworker who she loved to bits. Right from the start they were great with her allergies. They found safe foods for her that we didn't know about and always let us know what she was eating.

Monkey likes her food and she'd only been there a few weeks when she decided she liked the look of someone elses. She stole a sausage off somebody elses plate! She can't eat sausages -they have milk and wheat and sonetimes soya. In a way I'm glad it happened though as it reassured me about the way they dealt with things. She hardly swallowed any as they got it straight out of her mouth. They let me know straight away and asked what signs to look out for. They did have to give her medicine for tummy aches and green poos but other than that she was fine. I was kind of glad they saw a mild reaction as they didn't know us well at this time, I wondered if they thought I was just a fussy, over protective mum.

She's been at nursery a year now and has noved from babies to toddlers. She's with different staff and a new keyworker. They also have a new cook. I'm completely confident that whoever is caring for her will keep her safe though. They're even helping me to get things in place for when she starts school.

So to those of you with little babies with allergies, please don't believe the horror stories. There are wonderful places out there that will do a fantastic job of dealing with your child's allergies.

We've been so lucky to find one for Monkey. Her nursery are amazing and have made things so much easier for our whole family. If any of the staff read this I want to say a huge thank you. Monkey loves you all :-)

Hospital Update (Allergy Alphabet day 13)

Monkey's allergies are looked after by our local children's hospital. We have mainly seen our dietitian but today we met our allergy nurse for the first time.

We've been waiting for this appointment for a long time but we weren't really sure what to expect. We've had appointments in the past (before we were transferred to the children's hospital) where we have waited for ages only to come away feeling disappointed and having more questions than we went in with.

Today wasn't like that at all. We were in with the nurse for almost an hour and a half. I really felt like she listened to everything we had to say. And then she put a plan in place of how we are going to manage Monkey's allergies.

So today M is for management plans. We've been given written plans for allergy and asthma today, detailing exactly what should be done at what stage of a reaction/attack. They're going to be really helpful, not only for me but for anyone else who cares for Monkey. They've given me spare copies to take into nursery.

As well as looking at how to manage a reaction we also looked out how we were going to manage Monkey's allergies long term and how we were going to reintroduce any foods.

We've been given new medication. She now has a preventer inhaler as well as her reliver and her piriton has been replaced by cetirizine. We've also got new creams and ointments for her eczema.

We also appear to have got ourselves a new allergy. We've been advised to avoid sesame due to reactions to houmus.

We are going to try some food challenges though. Egg is the one I'm least worried about so we'll be starting the egg ladder at home tomorrow with some free from angel cake. I think she's going to like it - I just hope it likes her!

Her other food challenges are going to be done in hospital, starting with wheat. Apparently we should be seen as a priority case as her diet is so limited. I have no idea when it will be though. It's a scary time and I feel like I'm poisoning her but even if she can just tolerate a tiny amount of well cooked egg or wheat it will make such a big difference to her diet.

We see the nurse again in four months time but she's hopeful we will have been in for our wheat challenge by then.

Once again Monkey has taken this all in her stride and just enjoyed playing with the toys in the hospital. My little girl is amazing!

Allergy Alphabet - Blogging A to Z day 12

When you go shopping how much time do you spend looking at labels? And how much stuff do you just chuck in your trolley without even looking.

Before I had Monkey my answers would be not much and most of it. But that all changes when you're dealing with allergies.

L is for label checking. Over the past nearly two years I have become an expert label checker. I check everything that Monkey is going to eat. I even check if she's had it before. I learnt the hard way that recipes can and do change.

Luckily the top 14 allergens have to be clearly identified in bold on food labels. The top 14 are

• Cereals containing gluten
• Crustaceans
• Eggs
• Fish
• Peanuts
• Soya
• Milk
• Nuts
• Celery
• Mustard
• Sesame
• Sulphites
• Lupin
• Molluscs

Having these allergens clearly identified certainly makes label checking easier. However, people can be allergic to anything and whilst most of Monkey's allergens are on this list, there are some that aren't.

So, next time you're stuck in the supermarket behind someone who appears to be taking forever to read everything, please be patient. It could be me. And I promise I'm not trying to annoy you - I'm just trying to keep my Monkey safe.

Allergy Alphabet - Blogging A to Z day 11

Welcome back to my allergy alphabet. K is for kit - or more specifically our allergy kit. This is a little bag of medication that comes everywhere with us that helps us to keep Monkey safer and more comfortable if she does come into contact with her allergens.

So what's in the kit?

Paracetamol
Paracetamol is useful for less serious reactions where the main symptom seems to be tummy pain.

Piriton
Piriton is used for reactions involving rashes, hives or swelling. Although you can't buy it over the counter for children under 1, Monkey has had a prescription since she was 5 months. Her allergy plan says if we don't see an almost immediate improvement in symptoms we should ring 999.

Inhaler, spacer and face mask
This is probably the bit of kit I dislike the most. Reactions that affect Monkey's breathing are really scary so it's hard to stay calm and make sure she takes her inhaler properly. She has to have two puffs which can be repeated after five minutes if necessary. If no improvement after the second lot of two puffs then we have to ring 999.

Oilatum
This is used to treat Monkey's eczema and can be applied when needed up to six times a day. It comes in a huge bottle so usually this bit of kit stays at home. If she is suffering badly with her eczema I will put some in a little pot to apply while we're out and about.

It can be a pain at times to carry all this kit around but we never leave home without it. It makes me feel slightly less worried, although the chances are if she ate the wrong food she would probably end up in hospital. At least I have something to try and help her.

Allergy Alphabet - Blogging A to Z day 10

Most of my posts so far on this blogging challenge have been quite serious. That's kind of deliberate as I wanted to raise awareness and show just how much allergies affect Monkey and our family. It's not all doom and gloom though. Allergy kids still have fun and they still get treats. So with this in mind...

J is for Jelly Babies! Monkey loves them.

I discovered jelly babies completely by accident. I was doing some christmas shopping and having a complete strop that I couldn't get a selection box for Monkey. I had managed to get her a Moo Free one online but it was tiny and I'd seen lots of lovely christmas chocolate I wanted to buy. I was standing in the queue feeling very sorry for myself when I spotted a giant jelly baby.



I don't know why I picked it up. I think by this point I was in such a strop I was convinced she wouldn't be able to eat them. But they were Monkey-friendly! I bought them, took them home, wrapped them and forgot about them until christmas day.

Monkey was very excited when she opened them on christmas morning. Daddy gave her one to try and before we knew what was happening she had four in her mouth and two in each hand. I think it's safe to say they were a hit! I wish I'd got it on video but she was so quick.

I love the fact that she can have jelly babies as a treat for two main reasons.

1. It makes buying her a treat easier for friends and family.
Monkey is lucky to have lots of people who care about her and spoil her rotten. They want to buy her treats and are scared of getting her the wrong thing. The free from aisle can be a confusing place if you're not used to dealing with allergies. Many well meaning people have bought her dairy free chocolate only for her not to be able to eat it as it contains soya. I always feel awful having to explain especially when I know they've gone to extra effort to try and keep her safe.
Jelly babies are instantly recognisable and can be bought without going into any specialist aisles or shops. People are confident buying them so they are now my go-to recommendation if people want to buy her a treat.

2. It's 'normal' food and the same as her friends.
As Monkey gets older, she notices more and more if her food is different to her friends. Whilst she enjoys her free from biscuits, chocolate etc at home, when she's with her friends she wants the same as them. Jelly babies are a treat they can all enjoy together. And unlike free from treats they don't cost a fortune.

Allergy Alphabet - Blogging A to Z day 9

When I tell people about Monkey's allergies they quite often tell me that they know someone who is intolerant to whatever. And whilst I'm sure that's horrible and can lead to them being very uncomfortable, it's not quite the same thing.

So today I is for intolerance. How is it different to an allergy? How do you know which you've got?

To understand the difference between an allergy and an intolerance, you really need to be clear about what an allergy actually is.

According to Allergy UK a true food allergy will always involve the immune system. There are two kinds of allergy and this is where it gets confusing.

IgE allergies happen when the immune system releases specific IgE antibodies in an attempt to defend the body from an allergen. Symptoms develop quickly and can be severe and life-threatening. Anaphylaxis is the most severe kind of IgE reaction and requires immediate hospital attention.

Non-IgE allergies are were the confusion occurs. These used to be referred to as intolerances and sometimes still are although this incorrect. They are now recognised as true allergies as whilst they don't release the specific antibodies they do involve the immune system. Symptoms are nore delayed - usually from an hour to three days. Non-IgE allergies are harder to diagnose as they don't show up on blood or skin prick tests.

Monkey has a mix of IgE and non-IgE reactions.

Intolerances do not involve the immune system. Symptoms are often delayed and usually gut type problems. They are not life-threatening but can lead to sufferers feeling very uncomfortable. Unlike allergies, many sufferers can eat problem foods in small amounts - it is when they get a build up that they have problems. Apart from lactose intolerance there is no test available for food intolerances.

Working out whether you have a food intolerance or allergy can be tricky. Many doctors suggest keeping a food and symptoms diary which is something that we still do with Monkey.

Look in my letterbox #11

It's been another very quiet post week here at the Monkey House. But once again I'm linking up with Alice Megan for Look in my Letterbox.

I've had penpal letters from pals in Wakefield, Hereford and Canada. Anyone who knows me or reads this blog regularly will know that I'm slightly obsessed with cute writing sets so having these pop through my letterbox made me smile.

Monkey had a letter from one of her penpals from our facebook birth group. I love that if they keep it up as they get older they will have known each other right from the time they were born.

It's not very exciting but I've also had a set of plastic cups. Monkey has been using a Munchkin Miracle 360 Trainer Cup for a while now as I didn't want her drinking from a spout but didn't think she was ready for a cup yet. Monkey is always telling me that "Me big mummy!" and obviously had different ideas. I was about to put the top on her cup the other day when I turned round and saw this.

Apparently Mummy knows nowt and Monkey is absolutely ready for a cup! I got some IKEA ones from Amazon. I'm due an IKEA trip soon but wanted to get them quickly.



And that's it! We've had a few quiet weeks now. My postman will be thinking I'm ill. Wonder what next week will bring...

Allergy Alphabet - Blogging A to Z day 8

Well I'm now over a week into my A to Z blogging challenge. I'm well known for being useless at stuff like this so I'm very impressed with my little self. I think it helps that I could choose my own theme for the challenge and I really want people to understand more about Monkey's allergies. So on we go....

H is for Hospital, a place where no parent wants to see their children. We saw far too much of it with Monkey in her first few months. She was first sent in by the midwife at ten days old due to concerns about her weight.

In hospital at 10 days old

From then on our Health Visitor and GP sent us quite a few times to the Children's Observation and Assessment Unit. She always looked so tiny on those huge hospital beds.

At three months old we ended up in A&E who once again sent us down to the Children's Observation and Assessment Unit. Things were worse this time though and they decided to admit her to the main children's ward.

We spent five days in the hospital. It was awful. She cried constantly, she was in so much pain. We had a private room which was good in some ways but also meant I spent a lot of time on my own, in a small space with a screaming baby.

On the children's ward aged 3 months

Although those five days were awful, they were also the start of things getting better for Monkey. We got a diagnosis at last. The nurse looking after us was amazing, her son had allergies so she told us lots of things to look out for and things that helped.

Since then we've had lots of trips to the hospital but none so scary. They've all been appointments - no A&E visits or being sent there by the doctor. I still don't like it but Monkey seems to love it.

All her care now is with the Allergy Team at the Children's Hospital. Obviously I'd rather not be at hospital at all but if I have to then this place is amazing. We deal mainly with the dietitian, but we also have a consultant and specialist allergy nurse (we're waiting for appointments with these at the moment).

After a long time feeling like nobody was it's so nice to feel listened to at our appointments. I can be in for over an hour discussing Monkey's diet, any symptoms and the next steps for her. I never feel rushed or like I'm asking a silly question. I know I can ring whenever and someone will get back to me.

And Monkey? Well she just likes the waiting room...

Waiting at the hospital

Allergy Alphabet - Blogging A to Z day 7

Today I want to talk about guilt. I know as a parent it's part of the territory but a lot of my parenting guilt seems to be centred around Monkey's allergies.

So G is for guilt and I'm going to share with you some of the things I feel guilty about.

At ten days old Monkey was in hospital due to concerns about her weight. They were making me pump milk for her so they could see exactly how much she was taking (plenty as it happens - but not from a bottle!). Somebody decided that whilst I was attatched to this machine would be the perfect time to take blood from my tiny ten day old baby.

Now really there were two sensible options here - take her away so I didn't have to see it or let me hold her, cuddle her and let her feed if she wanted to. None of these happened. Instead they put her on the bed, just out of reach while I was still attatched to their machine and told me we'd both feel better if we could see each other.

I didn't feel better. And neither did Monkey. I still remember her looking up at me with these big innocent eyes. They struggled to get the blood. It must have hurt her and scared her and she was all on her own. I still feel guilty that I let it happen. I was a new mum and overwhelmed with everything that was happening. She will never be on her own for any tests again though.

At about two months after weeks of crying and terrible nappies the Health Visitor sent me to the GP and the GP sent me straight to the hospital. More guilt! I just thought all babies cried and pooed but they were worried about her. I should have known, I should have took her sooner.

Monkey's first allergy was dairy - diagnosed at three months. Nobody seemed to have a reason why but I was convinced it was something I had done (or not done) during pregnancy or those first few months that had caused it. During pregnancy my craving was cheese flavoured things and I practically lived in Hollands cheese and onion pies and Walkers cheese and onion crisps and I still think that had something to do with it. I've lost count of the experts who've told me it doesn't but it doesn't take away the guilt.

After we knew about Monkey's allergies I was advised that long term it would be best to carry on breastfeeding but that it would take up to six weeks for the dairy to leave my system. This was probably the time when I felt most guilty. Every time I fed her I felt like I was poisoning her, she would be ill after every feed.

I feel like this post could get very long so I'm just going to list a few of the things I feel guilty about.

• Eating things she can't have in front of her
• Her not getting a choice of food when we eat out
• She has to take a packed lunch when she goes to parties
• She might not get invited to parties as people are worried about feeding her (we have wonderful friends though so this one is probably just in my head)
• She was never allowed to any of the Messy Play sessions at our Children's Centre
• She won't be able to take Communion at church
• She is different to her friends
• She hates having her height and weight done at the hospital
• She still struggles with wheezing at night and I don't know how to make it better 

I don't want this post to be all doom and gloom though so as well as all the guilt I'm also super proud that we've come through the worst of it and have a happy smiley Monkey.

Allergy Alphabet - Blogging A to Z day 6

Monkey is taking part in a Free From Feast this year to raise money for Allergy UK. Last year she raised £200 and this year we want to do even better. So when I started this challenge today was obvious - F was for fundraising!

But the more I've been thinking about Monkey's allergies the more I've realised that there's another F that is a big part of every allergy parents life - FEAR!

They may not always look frightened. They'll be used to fighting for their kids and they'll have become experts in their allergies. I can guarantee you they'll still be scared.

They'll feel the fear pre-diagnosis when they know there's something wrong with their baby but nobody can tell them what.

They'll feel the fear when their baby isn't even on the chart for weight. The fear will get worse when they hear the words 'failure to thrive'. They'll come to realise that is just medical talk for poor growth but in that moment, along with everything else they're worrying about, they will think people are saying they're not looking after their baby properly.

Weaning will bring even more fear. With each new food they'll feel like they're potentially poisoning their child.

There will be fear when the baby starts nursery. How can anybody possibly keep their baby as safe as they do? Will everybody know about their allergies? What if they get another child's food?

There'll be fear about doing tests and giving medication. There'll be more fear about not.

Soft play centres and playgrounds are scary places. What if another child drops something? There's that fear again!

Most of all they fear seeing their baby in hospital again. They fear feeling helpless.

I've had all of these fears (and more!) with Monkey but I don't want her to feel scared. As she gets older I will need to teach her about her allergies. She needs to know how serious they can be. But I don't want her wrapped up in cotton wool. I don't want her thinking she can't do things. I don't want her feeling the fear.

I'll do that for her...

Monkey is raising money for Allergy UK

Allergy Alphabet - Blogging A to Z day 5

Welcome back to our allergy alphabet. Today we are up to letter E.

E is for egg, another of Monkey's allergies. This allergy came later. As far as I'm aware she didn't react to egg through breast milk but as we introduced solids she began to have more reactions and we were advised to avoid egg.

Whilst Monkey is less sensitive to egg than some of her other allergens her egg allergy is still quite serious. Allergy UK say that 70-80% of children with egg allergy can tolerate it well baked in the form of biscuits or cakes. At the moment the hospital are still advising that Monkey avoids egg in any form.

Egg will be the first of the major allergen that we try to reintroduce although this will still not be for some time.  Allergy UK say that most children with egg allergy outgrow it so I am feeling hopeful for the future. Even just being able to tolerate baked egg would make such a big difference.